Subcommunication and The Art of Mixed Messages A few weeks ago I got dinner with a friend. She was dating a guy, but things were not progressing towards exclusivity fast enough. She asked me what to do. (I don’t generally “switch teams,” but for my friends, anything) I suspected the guy genuinely liked her and […]
Subcommunication and The Art of Mixed Messages Read More »
A few things heard commonly in relationships (or at wedding ceremonies) are variations of the following: “I’m just so grateful to be with my best friend” “You’re my best friend, I love you” “I love that I’m marrying my best friend” Now, don’t get me wrong — I’m not trying to be a dick to
Your Wife Is Not Your Friend Read More »
Recently yours truly had an article of his rejected by an esteemed magazine. Now, no need to get our your torches and pitchforks out in my defense. They’re good people, and I’m OK. In fact — I was expecting it to happen — even though the content was great. You see, even though *I* like
The Route To Low Confidence Read More »
HOW TO CREATE WHAT YOU HATE One of the crazy things about humans is their ability to project. Aka, taking their own flaws, pathologies, etc. and accusing other people of doing them. We’ve been seeing a bunch of that taking place recently. (“Kill the ‘fascists,’ they are inciting violence!”) But truly, it’s as common in
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Ever wanted to talk to a girl or take things to the next level but “couldn’t” because you felt too anxious? I know it’s happened to me too many times to count. Anxiety is endemic in our society, and in the romantic realm it’s pretty much a given. The more you like someone, the more
The Truth About Anxiety Read More »
Almost every guy out there has at one point found himself enamored with a woman. So as one of those men, I’m sure you’ve said something like this before (or at least heard it from other guys): “She’s different than other girls” “She cares about me in ways no other woman does” “We really get
Why Relationships *Really* Work Read More »
You know one thing pretty much all guys who struggle with women have in common? A lack of total social awareness. Don’t get me wrong, these guys are not (necessarily) *clueless* about what’s going on around them. In fact, they might even be no worse than your average joe-schmo. But coupled with other issues, the little
The Power All “Players” Have Read More »
THE WOMEN YOU DESERVE Much angst is made in male circles these days about the “modern woman.” You’ve heard about her. Entitled. Out of shape. Negative. Often psychologically unstable. For most guys, not their dream partner. So endemic and unpalatable is this “modern woman” that a new fantasy among men has arisen: the foreign girl.
The Women You Deserve Read More »
I talk a lot about the importance of strategy over tactics. As in, not focusing on short-term actions that undermine the broader goal. Some examples? – Trying to get a girl when the very act of pursuit undermines your frame– Gaming a girl who is not a good fit for your broader relationship goals– Orienting
In Defense of Attacks Read More »
Women are fascinating creatures. They can act crazy one instant, and sweet and loving the next. They claim to hate assholes, yet seem to go for them. They say they want you to do something, yet get pissed off when you actually do it. For most men, women are mysterious creatures whose true wishes are
What Do Women Really Want From Men? Read More »
