Pat

“Can I Save My Marriage?”

A reader writes in, initially quoting me: “He has not shown up as a man. And escaping into another woman is not going to solve what created his current relationship problems.I know, because I spent the first couple of years with my wife in the same sort of situation.” My question is this, did you

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Admiration vs Desire

The other day I received a brief question from a reader regarding a previous email: “Men want to be admired; women want to be desire.” Could you explain this a bit more, the difference between being admired and desired? Or do you have an article you could point me to? —— I don’t have an article addressing

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Are You Too Poor For Women?

It’s no secret: women are making a lot more moolah today. And so more and more guys are getting a little more self-conscious about their financial situation. Hypergamy dictates that women only date across and up. So what to do if your bank account isn’t looking so pretty? Well, a little context to the above

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Are You Sexually Repressed?

One thing peddled quite a bit by the mainstream is the idea of repression, particularly sexual repression. It’s a very freudian concept, one at this point almost taken as a truism by modern dating and relationship writers: Repression is the #1 problem in intimate relationships. Commonly, you hear it directed towards anti-porn crusaders, religious conservatives or

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Should Pat Stedman Retire?

Every now and then I’ll get a question from some prospective client or observer. “Well, Pat you’re not dating anymore… things have changed a lot in the last couple years… should you really be giving dating advice anymore?” It’s a real big thinkus. Though in all fairness — I get it. How could I, someone

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Making Her Surrender

A reader writes in: Something I became aware of from this relationship is that I have a need to help the other person, and I start to become drained if I’m not. I started to look back at previous relationships and I noticed a trend that even included women who were very broken, and while

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Women Do All The Work… For You?

An observation on a call with a client got me thinking about something. Something I haven’t talked all too much about. And yet, something that many guys have witnessed and wondered about. What fascinating little phenomenon am I talking about? Female escalation. As in, you’re on a date… and despite you not really doing anything,

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When She Calls You “Daddy”

Received the following request for this topic the other day: It’s an interesting phenomenon, and a lot of guys have mixed feelings on the topic. I won’t go into too much depth here… (It’s one of the topics I cover extensively in my course, which BTW is set for release Monday November 25th…) But a

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