Candace Owens had an interesting tweet today I felt important to respond to:
And yet this is just scratching the surface isn’t it? Because we haven’t answered the why.
Why do women compete against other women in how they present themselves, even when these displays aren’t appealing to men?
To answer the question, let’s first take a look at men. Because we do the exact same thing.
Men compete against other men to gain position, and many men do this on a certain level to get more women. There is an idea that if a man can rise against other men in the dominance hierarchy, he will reap the rewards sexually.
It is not an entirely incorrect assumption. Women are drawn to men with high status and power. But not because such men themselves are necessarily attractive, rather because they are perceived as attractive to other women. These men dominate other men, so they are assumed to be valuable, and because they are assumed to be valuable other women pursue them. Which in turn amplifies the assumption about their sexual desirability; if other women want him, why shouldn’t she?
It is little more than marketing hype, which is why I classified Preselection as such in my book “The 3 Pillars of Attraction.” Nevertheless, hype works. We are herd creatures.
But does a man *need* power and status to get women? No. In fact, women often find the male dominance hierarchy stupid. Take ambition. Most women cannot relate to it, and don’t find it particularly appealing in a man when push comes to shove. Don’t get me wrong, they like in the abstract that their man has something going for him, and is able to lead other men. But on a personal level it is usually a net negative for a woman. She gets less attention from her man and has less fun, because ambitious men tend to be busy men. This is why you see women all the time cheat or end up with “losers” who lead a much more chill, fun lifestyle — guys who know game.
Women want a man to make them feel a certain way, and this has nothing to do with how successful he is. That is men competing with other men, not trying to get women. It is an indirect way to sexual success, not a direct one.
And it is essentially the same with women and their various fashion trends.
Women feel like the way to male desire is to win the competition against other women. They have a hard time accepting that men reject the premises of the female competition, and want something far more simple from women — form fitting sundresses, reasonably long healthy hair, proportional ass and tits. Because to do so requires them to go against the herd of other women, and risk looking “unimpressive” among their own sex.
Is this starting to make sense now?
Men compete against men for women, but the women don’t care much about the competition. Women compete against women for men, and the men feel the same way.
It’s not going to change until what represents a “high status women” changes.
So long as it is Kim Kardashian “girl bosses” that young girls are looking up to, culture will cater to it. Whether or not men find this female archetype attractive is mostly erroneous. They only need to capture a certain percentage of porn-brained guys to claim “this is what men want.” Even when most do not in fact want it at all.
The moral of the story is two-fold.
First, you can tell a woman’s self-worth and values based on how much she gets caught up in these trends. You can also tell that she is more in her mind than her body. These women usually cannot feel what a man actually wants, and need to look to other women to tell her.
Second, understand that if YOU are following “manosphere trends” in hopes that it will get you women… you are taking a LONG and INEFFICIENT route there.
There are broke boys out there who have no problem sleeping with gorgeous women, because they are giving women what THEY want.
They aren’t trying to be a “hard worker.” They vibe, and make a woman feel alive when they are together.
The good news?
You can learn what behavior is attractive to women easily if you get my course.
I cover it all over 18 hours: mindset, female psychology, game, dating, intimacy, and “advanced topics” (do not check out this module until you’ve completed the others).
And the course is just getting started. I’ve got a LOT of great content getting added in next year as well.
You can buy it here: https://masterclass.patstedman.com/sales-page
Reminder all courses are deducted from coaching.
– Pat
