One common “viral” tweet you see derivations of more or less every day in the manosphere is about what sort of woman you should marry.
These tweets all list essentially the same traits. Dresses feminine. Cooks. Keeps house tidy. Low notch count. Good values. Submissive. Trad. Etc. etc
Nothing wrong with any of these, of course. And I suppose it’s good to have a concrete list for guys who don’t know where to begin when it comes to screening for a quality woman.
Yet I also get bored with these lists — not only because they are unoriginal and repetitive — but because they are ultimately “safe” platitudes with limited real-world use. I’ve worked with enough guys to know that while the women they end up with are attractive, high-integrity girls… they are less cookie-cutter in their behavior, and often have more fire their personality.
The reason for this, of course, is that above-average IQ men aren’t satisfied by merely a “good girl who does trad things.” Role-oriented women are boring to such men; they are imagined as the ideal simply because guys are jaded from the onslaught of broken and brainwashed women they encounter today.
Which is why I’d encourage these men to think beyond the “trad housewife” trope. Sure, it is nice to have a woman who cooks, cleans, cares for the kids… but these are ultimately just “jobs,” and are not what makes you satisfied with a woman.
The true role of a woman for a man is to be his muse.
To inspire him, challenge him, excite him, support him, motivate him…
To create EMOTION within him that propels him FORWARD.
Beyond this, what a woman can or cannot do is of secondary importance. Cooks, maids, nannies can all be paid for. And if you have a muse, your creative output will be so great, money should not be a problem.
But what makes a woman a muse?
Aside from being beautiful, she must also be free-spirited.
This is an art lost on most modern women, as it entails a genuine — not superficial — connection with her femininity. And it means eschewing the “rat race” / herd mindset most modern women have fallen prey to.
But fundamentally it means the woman will not be put in a cage. Whether she is easy-going or feisty, there must be an element of her that cannot be tamed.
This is not to say she is incapable of surrendering. Nor does it mean she is difficult or flighty.
A muse can be very loyal. The point is that her surrender to you is not automatic. You must earn her heart to receive her light.
I know phrases like “earning her heart” or hearing “women who will not be put in a cage” triggers manosphere guys. It seems too adjacent to feminist talking-points about “independent women” who “do what they want” (blah blah blah).
But the big issue with feminists isn’t so much their pro-woman propaganda, but that they are actually none of the things they claim to be.
They are INSECURE women who try to put down the strength of men to compensate for their own inadequacy. They are unwilling to ever surrender because they are AFRAID, not because they are strong. And they are unable to be strong because they reject the very thing that would make them it: their femininity.
A woman cannot be confident in her core if she lacks femininity, just as a man cannot be confident in his own without masculinity. It is key to each’s identity.
But a woman also cannot be confident if she needs a man so badly, she offers up her gifts to just any one.
This is how a woman loses her light, her radiance. It is how she ceases to be a muse, and loses her inspirational power — gradually becomes a succubus and a parasite.
The point I hope you understand is not that a woman should not know how to cook, or dress feminine, or be trad, or whatever.
It’s that you must go beyond the veneer and into the essence of what makes a feminine woman.
There are many women who do everything right on paper who will drain you of all your life force. And there are women who seemingly break every rule except the one that matters:
They bring light to your life, and make you a better man.
Choose accordingly.
And if you need help finding and keeping such women?
Apply to work with me here: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
