Interesting tweet from FortWorthPlayboy (FWP) the other day:
(Check out our interview if you missed it)
I was asked what I thought of it by a reader. Surprisingly, I am actually not in full agreement.
Not that I don’t see FWP’s point.
I agree many a girl has claimed she “was single…” but nevertheless indulged in an ex or past flame during that period of “celibacy.” Because that “didn’t count.”
Indeed, this is the preferred route of most “good girls” who might want some intimacy, because it allows them opportunity for sexual release without the added “notch count” — while also offering a trusted, familiar lover (which believe it or not, the vast majority of women prefer).
My main disagreement is not this common pattern exists, but that women are constantly on the “sex circuit” — that they are ALWAYS at any given time of their life, fucking.
This is not what I have observed both from women I’ve dated, and from women in my general social network.
Of course, I’m aware that I could be deceived. Women lie. How am I to know their real sexual history?
And the truth is I don’t. No one does. In an age of big cities and anonymity, a woman’s sexual past is hidden and opaque.
But I’m pretty good at telling when I’ve been duped, and most of these women had minimal incentive to lie to me; they knew my own history — I was no prude. Many of them were indeed excited to share their sexual past; this is one of the perks of being a “chad alpha male fuckboy” like I was.
And so what I learned from these ladies was that women have sexual seasons.
What this means is simple: women will go out on some dates, maybe hook up and eventually start seeing some guy regularly. And then when this blows up, they might go out on another few dates to feel better.
But many get tired of this cycle soon after the rebound. They come to the conclusion that “dating sucks” and that it’s not worth the effort. They close themselves off emotionally and even sexually. They focus on hanging out with friends and work.
This goes on for a few months, maybe even a year or two in some cases. Before some guy or experience crosses their path, reopens them up, and they start dating again.
I had one girl describe this to me as her “slut phase.” She went from not dating or seeing a single guy for nearly two years, to dating three at the same time. This went on for about 3-4 months before she ended up seeing one more seriously. When this fizzled, she went through another celibate period.
Not all girls, of course, operate this way. Some are permanent “branch swingers” — they are either with a guy or focused on getting their next one. These girls are usually serial monogamists, with perhaps brief flings in between relationships. They do not know how to be alone, and always need to have some love interest in the picture. Others are more “independent and horny” and simply remain single and on the prowl, as FWP says, either gathering new notches or stopping by an old flame or fuck buddy for “no strings attached” sex.
But the point I’m making here is that not all women need to constantly have dick in them. Many women need to “feel in the mood” to start dating, because they have to put themselves out there, put work in. If they’re burned out they will focus their attention on other things. This is how you get women who are horny as HELL because they haven’t had sex in ages.
Anyway, some food for thought.
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– Pat
