When “Zoom Dates” Are Actually OK

Probably it was something of a novelty in March/April 2020. Back then there was all sorts of excitement about the world ending, accompanied nevertheless with the naivety that things would “get back to normal” soon, and in-person meetings could resume.

Two years on though people are still for the most part retarded, with many still terrified to meet others under normal circumstances.

And so “zoom dates” — rather than be a curious blip in dating history, have become a regular request among neurotic women online.

Generally, my advice with these zoom dates has been simple: don’t have them. They are stupid and unserious. A woman who asks for them is doing you a favor by revealing herself to be anxious and unstable, so you don’t have to waste your time with her.

But in fact there *is* a benefit to doing something like a “zoom date” under certain circumstances, so long as you approach it in a certain way. Indeed, it can actually amplify your attraction.

What is this special approach and context?

First, I will reiterate my advice to not humor girls who exude extreme anxiety about germs or stranger-danger or whatever. Continue to use such requests on her end for remote-dates as a filter; don’t waste your time on girls who are too stressed to ever have fun.

With that said, however…

A brief, 5-15 minute casual video call with a girl can actually be HUGE in setting up a proper date, and getting her psyched for it.

And here’s why:

You see, women are fundamentally interested in a guy because of his energy. She wants a guy based on how he makes her feel.

Most guys screw up dating in general, but especially online dating, because they struggle to make an emotional imprint on a woman. Their profile is filled with “facts” and other lame, unevocative responses. Women read it, and get bored.

And yet many give guys a chance anyway because said man is “handsome enough” or he said something at least that jumped out to her. Nevertheless, she tends to go into the date ambivalent.

Which is why a quick FaceTime or zoom call can actually be very powerful. Because it gets her to feel your energy, and gives her a teaser of what she can expect on the date itself.

Key here of course is the length, your vibe, and what you actually talk about. Remember you want to keep this light — in many ways this is just like a cold approach. You’re just talking about random stuff, funny story, great bagel you just got… content is not so important as making her feel like you are fun and she knows you.

And then, just when she’s starting to really enjoy herself, when the energy in the chat is cresting… let her know you’ve got to run but “you’ll see her that weekend” (or whenever you have the actual date planned; you can even set it up on the call).

This shows you don’t “need” to talk to her, and you’re just a busy guy with high energy who wanted to check in for a few minutes, and perhaps sort out the logistics during it.

(Of course, calibrate accordingly… if she wants a little more comfort, you can talk a bit longer… just keep it under 20 minutes, you don’t want to have a proper date on the call)

It’s the same concept behind “calling” a girl before a date. Just with video, cause some girls care more about it.

Will it push some women away?

Sure. But remember your goal in dating isn’t to get *every* girl, it’s to push away the ones who waste your time and who aren’t good fits. It’s to polarize effectively so the women you spend your hard-earned cash on are a higher probability of working out.

Anyway, speaking of hard earned cash…

You should probably spend it before it gets inflated away.

And since Module 3 of my masterclass goes into all these various tactics that attract women in detail…

I’d recommend buying it if you want to improve your dating life.

Grab it here: https://masterclass.patstedman.com/sales-page

(Reminder all purchases are deducted from coaching.)

– Pat