There’s been a lot of chatter recently about comedian Pete Davidson and why he’s been sleeping his way around the celebrity circuit (Kim Kardashian is a recent conquest).

I won’t go too much into this, as everything that comes out of “that” world is laundered through PR groups, and tends to have a specific agenda. Stories are amplified and narratives created about individuals as part of their brand development (and to distract the masses) — it’s far less organic than people believe.

Nevertheless, let’s humor the tabloids. Apparently, Pete Davidson does well with women for two reasons: 1) He has a big cock, and 2) He is funny.

Which to be fair makes sense. While the obsession with “big dicks” is a more common concern among men than women — data suggests women don’t want nearly as big of a penis in them as porn our media conveys — it’s not surprising that women want to “see what it’s like” as a curiosity. Guys with a reputation for being well endowed tend to get more attention from women, though it’s usually short term.

(An aside: this is probably part of the agenda around these stories. Pete Davidson is a scrawny and not particularly attractive guy. So why is *he* sleeping with all of these celebrities? “Because he makes jokes and has a big dick.”

This is a way to shape preferences among women, and to engineer male behavior so that they believe the way to sex with women is to entertain them — to make guys into glorified toys, and to create insecurity among them. This is just another phase in the social engineering against masculinity in men that’s been going on for years.)

So it’s no surprise Pete’s relationships tend to only last a few months with these women. Some may believe it’s because Pete is a “player” and is happy to move on after the initial honeymoon period. While this is perhaps true, why don’t you hear women being upset about their time with him ending? Why does it always seem to be mutual?

Because while humor can be very useful in creating attraction, generally guys who rely on humor have problems with self-confidence.

Comedians are notorious for having self-esteem issues for a reason. Humor is a great way of coping with not getting your needs met. Sure, it’s great to make a girl laugh — you get validation from it. But when you need that validation it creates issues for attraction over the long term, because you will always be cracking jokes and trying to get a reaction from her.

In other words, over time funny guys start to feel like needy guys to women. They aren’t decisive, and are reactive. After the honeymoon phase when this “game” reveals itself, the dynamic depolarizes and the relationship gradually deteriorates.

Which is actually the main focus of this email: guys in relationships, pay attention to how you use humor as an indirect way of getting your needs met.

How often to you joke with your woman when you want to have sex, rather than simply go for it? How often do you avoid saying what you actually want?

Humor is great, but don’t let it become a coping mechanism. Both Patrice O’Neill and Seth Rogan are “funny” but you can feel the difference between them, because only the former had his humor coming from a solid masculine core. The other uses it as a form of compensation for his own low self-esteem.

Indeed, it’s no surprise “ironic” humor is the mainstay of Gen Z, which is (overall) the most mentally ill and insecure generation to date:

Anyway, I think you get the idea.

You don’t need to be confident to sleep with women if you know how they work and can spark attraction. But you do need to be confident to keep them.

The good news?

My coaching works on both areas at once. So whether you’re a funny guy who struggles with his sense of self, or a confident guy who struggles to spark attraction… or whether you’re “behind the curve” and need help across the board…

I’m here to get you the life with women you deserve.

Apply here: www.patstedman.com/application

– Pat