In the last email we talked about women who want to “be married” but don’t think so much about being a wife.
And yet there needs to be an addendum to this… as men have their own problem in this department.
Hang around the manosphere long enough and you’ll begin to think women want a man always on the hustle. A guy who works hard and “brings in the bacon.”
It’s not “wrong” advice, to be fair. Women DO want financially successful men. And a guy with a knack for industry — who “makes it happen” — so long as this guy also knows how to have fun, he will have no shortage of women courting him.
Fortune herself is a woman, and we all know women compete.
And yet what catches a girl’s eye is not necessarily what keeps her around.
Understand… a woman may LOVE that you are a busy guy with things going on. She will notice your energy, and be drawn to it.
But if you don’t pay attention to her, or make her a priority in your life… that relationship isn’t going to last.
Guys don’t have much of a hard time with the idea that the woman you marry should act like a wife.
They can’t forget that they also need to act like a husband… and need to address their woman’s needs.
Ignoring the woman you committed to is emotional abuse.
I know work is important… especially if you are the one bringing in all the money. And I also know that you can’t make a woman your mission. This is a sure-fire way to not only lose direction in life, but to lose her.
But she must be cherished nevertheless. And you need to set aside time for her that CANNOT be infringed upon.
Otherwise, she’ll feel less and less important… and her femininity will wither. Eventually she will probably leave.
Anyway, just a little reminder for your gentlemen.
You can’t be as aloof in a relationship as you were when you were single.
Dynamics evolve, and going deeper is the only way to maintain the intimacy.
And you can’t go deeper with the basic level techniques you see online.
You need to be able to handle some very difficult conversations. To clear out shame, so you can lead not just materially… but spiritually.
How to do that?
A lot of inner work, over a lot of years.
How to do it faster?
Apply to work with me here: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
