Very often I’ve been asked what books have influenced my thinking around women.
And I feel like people have been rather disappointed by my response.
You see, I don’t read that much.
At least not in a “formal” sense.
Ok, I read a TON. But my material is diffuse — there’s no real organization to this. Sometimes it’s books, often it’s blogs, other times simple social media content. And it comes from all over.
My ideas are SYNTHESIZED from these disparate areas, including my own experience (and those of others).
I organically attempt to figure things out — books are a supplement, and their main value is generally SPEEDING UP my own understanding of things.
Bronze Age Mindset, for instance, took an idea I was developing on women and their draw towards male energy and accelerated it months
Levels of Energy saved me easily a year on concepts I was working on regarding vibration and how it creates different “dating markets” due to its level of detail.
Models helped to catalyze my thoughts on the distinct role of game — what I call “persona” in a more macro sense — which was the beginning of my development of the three pillars of attraction.
And yes, even The Rational Male helped me to understand the nature of the female shadow — an element missing from almost the entire canon of attraction literature — even though the author himself doesn’t understand this is the only real value of the book.
But books are very very rarely what “changes my paradigm” on things. And when it comes to the changes I manifest in my clients, they represent a MINIMAL element of my expertise.
The reason?
Because you CANNOT truly understand something only from books.
Being “book smart” is a backhanded compliment for a reason. Because “book smart” people have NO experience or practical application of their knowledge.
They are stuck in theory, in their “ivory tower” so to speak.
Indeed, the idea of knowing something through books is only one degree removed in stupidity from the idea of knowing something through having a certification.
It’s why so much of college is BULLSHIT.
There’s a movie I loved as a kid, “The Cider House Rules.” It’s a hard movie to describe, as it speaks to the complicated themes of human psychology and morality.
Toby Maguire is basically an orphan who gets taken under the wing of the headmaster / doctor (Michael Caine) at an early 1900s orphanage. He becomes a son of sorts to him, as most children got adopted, but Maguire didn’t.
Caine deals with all sorts of illnesses the kids have at the orphanage. But his main medical role is as an obstetrician who not only performs births but abortions. Women come there secretly to dump off their children, one way or another.
Maguire becomes an assistant of sorts to Caine, basically learning how to do what Caine does.
A brief spoiler (it won’t at all ruin the movie) — Caine FORGES a diploma for Maguire. Maguire is shocked — he’s not a doctor, he didn’t go to medical school. Caine disagrees. “You’ve been doing this work for over a decade, you have more experience than most doctors twice your age.”
And Caine is right.
You learn by DOING, and you learn fast by doing under the eye of experts who have done whatever it is you are trying to learn for years longer than you.
Mentorship IS the fastest way to learn, and the most natural.
Books are supplements to mentorship, they do not replace it.
Which is why whenever I’ve wanted to learn something REALLY well…
I’ve found someone to work under asked questions took actionIf you are looking for a short cut, this is the only way to do it.
Books are maps, NOT the territory.
Anyway, I think you catch my drift.If you’re looking for such an apprenticeship, apply here: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
