So end of last week while talking about the extremely fucked up court case in the UK re: a socially anxious kid getting prosecuted for talking to a girl, I promised I’d tell a tale about a similar experience yours truly went through.
An experience that helped me to understand just how the above court case can even be going forward… because let’s be real, it’s hard to imagine a girl would go through all the trouble to ruin the life of a harmless, insecure guy who approached her, touched her back, and said hello.
And yet… such women do exist. I know, because I had a similar reaction as this kid.
The story:
It was the summer of 2012 or ’13 and I was spending a Friday after work chilling at a venue in Philadelphia on the Delaware River (the name escapes me). It was a new spot, one of the hip locations to be at over the summer: an open air dance bar, with different music / scenes in different sections, all around good vibes, etc. etc.
I had gone there quite a bit with friends, both day and night, and had had excellent results meeting girls there. It was quickly becoming one of my favorite spots in the city.
Anyway, on this particular occasion I was there with a pretty big group. Most of them were not interested in meeting women, but they provided a good “home base” for me to bounce out and talk to other women from.
(An aside: If you don’t have friends who want to meet women, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go out with them… they can be a GREAT base of operations where you can go meet other women… and a great fall back to laugh off any rejections that might emerge)
At this point I was in the full swing of my “dating career”, had hundreds of approaches under my belt — so when I went up to a group of about 5 girls for a “vibe check,” I expected a fairly normal, textbook start to the interaction.
Instead what I received was pretty insane, something that’s become a favorite story not only among friends but family.
I entered the group, placing each hand gently at the mid-back of the girls I was passing through, and opened with a smile:
“You girls look like you’re having fun, what’s the occasion?”
Almost immediately after the words came out of my mouth, the girl to my left looked at me, started crying, and ran off.
Her friends proceeded to call me a piece of shit, I yelled back at them “I didn’t do anything” — in response one of them stole the sunglasses off my head and ran into the crowd and another one body checked me.
I told them I didn’t want anything to do with them, just wanted my glasses back… finally caught up with the girl who took them, who lied to my face about having them. At this point the situation was growing hostile and I gave up considering they were like $5, wasn’t worth an incident with the bouncers which I was bound to lose.
It remains one of the weirdest things that ever happened to me.
And might have been extremely traumatic, had I not had so many other positive experiences with women. But since I knew it wasn’t my fault… I laughed the whole thing off. The only thing that I could infer about her strange response was that she must have been abused or hurt by a guy, maybe I looked like him, at any rate I was the target of all of her baggage.
Which I’m sure was the same case with this poor guy in the UK.
He approached a girl who had severe emotional issues, and who was looking for a reason to justify them.
Enter this kid, an easy mark who wasn’t calibrated or confident, and could easily be blamed… giving her the excuse for all the other shit going on in her life.It’s the sign of a sick system that these sort of accusations are given the weight that they are.
But, the system is what it is at the moment.
Which is why as a guy you need more discernment than ever before.
You need to be able to read whether a girl is unstable or not.
And, how to respond if shit hits the fan.
Now, will this *likely* be something you experience?
Probably not.
Most girls, believe it or not, are normal people simply looking for connection.
But discernment has its uses across the board.
For instance, in knowing exactly which tactic on a certain girl, because you know her better than she knows herself.
And moreover: seeing which girls are for fun, and which are keepers.
The best way to use this absolutely essential skill?
Working with me.I’m a natural at it. My ENTP mind is wired around pattern recognition and communication discrepancies… so people can’t hide their true intentions and baggage from me.
But even more than that… I have 11 years of experience studying and applying it in the world of women and dating.
To apply to learn my secrets, go here: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
