So yesterday’s email on energy had a little section on responding to another guy’s advances on your woman.
To quote:
“But there are times a little dose of dark energy can be useful.
For instance, let’s say in general you’re a pretty chill, confident guy… not possessive, and so not jealous about your woman.
An abundance mindset, if you will.
But what if your lady is out there talking to another guy, and the guy is down to clown with her?
Whatcha gonna do bucko? You gonna sit there and let her take it?…
So, when it comes to women… don’t fall into the fear of scarcity.
But if you want a girl, fight for her.
Don’t sit back and allow another guy to monopolize her.
There are moments to tap into that dark, dirty energy… even if you’re otherwise a clean guy.”
————
This section unfortunately confused a couple of you, since I got a bunch of emails asking how you can avoid seeming possessive / insecure breaking up said situation where another guy is monopolizing your girl.
Well, first things first.
You shouldn’t feel insecure because you know your value… but even more importantly, you know SHE does.
If it’s obvious the guy is the one doing all the heavy lifting… trust your girl to do most of the work on this front. Don’t bother getting involved, let her separate and seek you out.
In contrast, if your girl is seriously entertaining these guys’ advances, you need to ask yourself what you’re doing with the girl… and consider the state of the relationship.
But let’s be real.
Many situations fall somewhere in the middle, since guys have different preselection / persona / personalities from each other.
So it’s inevitable at some point your girl will find herself talking to a guy she’s a bit attracted to, and even though she’s got no intention of cheating… won’t feel compelled to immediately leave the interaction.
Ergo while you shouldn’t panic… you also can’t be complacent.
At a certain point, if the above occurs, you need to intervene to break things up.
The best way to do this?
Enter the conversation, apply some physical contact onto your woman, and introduce yourself warmly but firmly to the guy.
If he’s not a scumbag, he’ll get the message.
(Many will compliment you on your woman and engage more with you, though watch this — it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s disengaging)
Guys who were just trying to get your girl will find a reason to leave.
Can you take your girl and leave the situation?
Yes, but I wouldn’t do it immediately.
It subcommunicates that you don’t feel like you can hold frame up to the guy if you need to take your girl away.
Better to engage the guy, neutralize the threat, and then separate from the situation afterwords.
(Many of these guys have become big fans of mine for doing this — and apologize for hitting on my girl)
But, there are times when you might need to be more aggressive… and that’s when said interloping guy is putting hands on your girl.
(Your girl should be somewhat uncomfortable with this FYI)
In these cases, you come over and be direct with him, cutting in between him and your girl, taking his hand.
“Hey, I’m Pat — what’s up?”
Escalate or deescalate accordingly from there based on how he responds.
But note that most guys will back off if you are at least somewhat imposing and make a show of force.
Anyway, the only problem with all of the advice above?
Reading the situation.
It’s easy to talk about tactics. But gauging a guy’s intentions — and most importantly, your girls — is paramount when it comes to responding.
The truth is that many of you guys will find your girl in this situation… but she’s in fact the one who instigated it.
The question is thus less what to do tactically, but what to do strategically with the relationship.
Never forget that women are devious creatures.
Make sure you read the subtle signals they drop about their intentions.
And never, ever underestimate them.
Unless, of course, you want things to go sour for you… fast.
So what to do?
Get cheated on and lose her the hard way…
Or hire me to teach you to understand female subcommunication so you can remain in control.
Cause gents…
Knowing how to read a woman’s signals is important not only if you want to avoid your relationship fall apart.
But it’s essential to build something amazing with a girl.
Women are creatures of subtlety.
What they say is rarely what they mean.
A curse for most men…. but a blessing for those who can decipher it.
Since it means the feminine’s gifts with few of it’s burdens.
Apply to learn the secrets here: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
