Another reader question for you today:

“I had 3 or 4 situations like this already, basically what happens is that I have a great first date with a beatiful girl, we drink, kiss and laugh a lot and it usually ends at that or she invites me home and it ends after the sex.

Why don’t they want a second date, what’s wrong?”

Well dear reader — first let’s address the most obvious explanation.

The sex wasn’t anything special.

I know, I know… this is harsh. And btw… I’m not implying the sex was BAD. Both parties might have enjoyed.

(Moreover, it’s only about being good in bed… but about having good sexual chemistry with the other person)

But as Señoir Bob (@bobthewelder30) put it on Twitter:

“You slay some killer pipe your getting a second date…”

Moving on… are there other reasons this might happen?

Of course.

The truth is, your first date is really a first impression.

And girls will categorize you based on the vibe you give off.

Are you a weirdo / creep?

A boring nice guy?

A fun hook up for the night?

***Or someone who she really likes, and might fall for?***

Most guys fall into categories a) or b). So much so that those in those categories have a hard time believing categories c) and d) exist separately.

If a girl wants to sleep with you, she wants to be with you — right?

Wrong.

If your vibe is casual and “player” like she may have some biological drive to sleep with you, particularly if the moment is exciting and calls for it.

(Most hook ups actually have much less to do with your skill, but you targeting the right girl at the right time and not fucking it up)

But she’s got no interest having you in her life.

Why’s that?

There are many reasons.

(Most of them are unconscious ways you’re behaving, and require someone like yours truly to do some deep work on you to shift the “energy” flows)

But to touch upon the veneer:

You’re not showing any depth.

No real personality, just a very charming persona.

You sell her in the moment but when she’s away from you she puts it behind her.

A very common problem, to be honest.

And while better than the guys who don’t even get the juices flowing on the date… still something that will stop you from having a great relationship with a girl.

Which is where I come into play.

It’s tough in general to see where you’re going wrong with women, without an outside eye.

(Facts: If you *really* knew what you were doing wrong, you wouldn’t be struggling so much)

But it’s even tougher when you have success with women, but can’t keep them around.

It’s like you know how to generate attraction, obviously.But why can’t you keep it?

It’s advanced stuff only advanced eyes can see.

(most guys who get “good” with women stay stuck here forever; indeed, they justify being single as a “choice” to avoid confronting that they’re not as good as they think)

Anyway, you get the idea.

If you’re ready to go to the next step, apply here: www.patstedman.com/application

– Pat