One thing I’ve noticed talking to some of my “normie” friends about dating… is that very often, seemingly good dating prospects go downhill around dates 2-4.
Of course, there are many reasons why this can happen.
— One party is just looking for sex, and doesn’t want to get serious.
— Big red flags emerge with past history / weird habits
— Ex steps back into the picture / personal issue takes attention
But if we’re being honest, these are exceptions to the norm.
The most common reason is far more sad.
Modern dating is, as many of us know, pretty ruthless.
People are used to disappointment, getting hurt, transactional dynamics.
So when two people like each other.
One of the parties, rather than start to invest, starts to put their guard up.
I find this is especially the case with women.
You’ll be dating for a couple of weeks. Everything seems great. And then all of a sudden she starts making all sorts of demands and excuses of why things can’t work out.
Pressure and issues which, of course, kill the connection and generally lead the guy to break things off. Which then leads the girl to regret what she did, and months later, try to get the guy back into her life (which doesn’t usually work out).
Now, I’m not making any “advisements” here.
These women are without question coming to the potential relationship with baggage.
But it’s important to understand… most of what women do in this situation:
1. has nothing to do with you
2. doesn’t even really have much to do with her
It’s just a self-sabotaging protective mechanism she’s learned after probably being dumped by guys in the past.
And is in many cases, possible to transcend.
How to do it?
Well, the devil is in the details.
(Details I only share with those I work with.)
But one thing is certain: you need to call her out on her bullshit.
Because if you don’t… not only is she wasting your time, she’s wasting her own.
Understand: the art of dating isn’t finding that “perfect woman.”
(In fact if you find a “perfect girl”… be very, very cautious… you’re likely dealing with girl game)
It’s finding someone who is genuinely good at their core, and whose issues are easy to transcend or minor enough to be tolerated.
And much of this has to do with confident, non-outcome dependent honesty.
Because it’s THIS that shows her that you actually care.
And that she can be vulnerable, and stop avoiding intimacy.
I know… many might not like this advice. After all they’ve been in “the sphere” long enough to “never settle.”
Of course it’s no coincidence all of these guys are single and hate relationships.
So if that’s not your long-term goal…
If you want to learn how to date better, so you can choose better…
(Rather than not choose at all, and larp about women like an idiot)
Apply to work with me here: www.patstedman.com/application