One thing that’s pretty common with guys just getting into game, and is ironically hilarious, is that they miss the forest through the trees with seduction.
For instance, rather than be a player and get laid… they act like a player and don’t get laid.
Rather than act natural, they project this overt, cagey, sexually flirtatious vibe with women… because they read on some forum that women are attracted to men who get with women.
Which is really a half-truth, at best.
Women do indeed like men who are attractive to other women.
Perception is contagious, especially among the fairer sex.
But like men who find women who sleep around to be gross, women feel the same way.
No, it’s not as big of a deal to them as it is to us. Women have a higher biological tolerance towards male promiscuity, as it subcommunicates evolutionary fitness… unlike its female corollary.
But unless a girl is trying to hook up that night, it’s not a positive (easy enough to get past for most, perhaps, but it’s not something that builds up trust).
And even then… if communicated in this cheesy, overt manner it only makes things more difficult.
This is a subtle point, but understand:
Women want to be with a guy who is good with women, who will give them a good experience… but they don’t want to be the girl who went home with the player.
The guys who are best with women understand that discretion is KEY to a woman feeling comfortable opening up sexually to you.
Women are creatures of innuendo.
A look and a few words can tell a woman whether or not you understand women and are going to be a fun time.
A look and a few words can tell a woman whether she can trust you with her sexual secrets.
It’s the sort of essential understanding of female nature that too many wannabe players don’t get. Women care about their reputation.
And women are looking for men who by nature embody masculinity and prowess, not men who are desperate to prove it.
So be the actual player who actually gets women, not the fake player who is trying to seem like some alpha (and actually just comes across as needy)
It’s the latter guy who gets comments like “you’re such a player”… and yet also rejections on their advances… while the former man, who is cool and composed tones it down and closes.
Anyway, these are little nuances to male-female interactions and there’s a good chance you’ll miss it.
It took me years (and much progress) to be able to introspect and see why despite “doing everything right” with women and getting accused of being a playboy… I was actually not getting that many women.
Which is why you might want to consider working with me.
Because sometimes, the things you are screwing up are small.
A little too much cockiness that’s subcommunicating desperation… a little too much flirting and entertaining that’s sending a bit too much eagerness…
Things that are crushing your ability to attract women.
Things that are imperceptible to you, but clear to me.
Apply if you want an expert eye: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
