So I’m going to air a theory with ya’ll today that I’ve been musing on for awhile… and undermines an enormous amount of current thinking (whichever way you look in the dating world)
You hear a lot on the internetz about “what women want” from men.
Some claim it’s strength.
(This is true, especially physically… but it’s much more relevant for respect vs desire)
Others argue it’s excitement.
(Definitely true… though women can suffer serious comfort issues with guys who live like this)
Still more state it’s power.
(Men with influence and money who make the world move… what could be more desirable?)
And finally, there are those who give the prize to depth.
(If you can penetrate a woman’s soul, her body is naturally an easy side effect)
But the truth is… none of these traits are what really makes things work for girls.
Or at least… they’re just the surface.
What women really want, especially today, as they are becoming bombarded with more and more life expectations… more and more “FOMO” and “who is happier” competition…
What women want is fantasy.
Women want a story. A romance. An escape.
Something that triggers their imagination.
Something that stimulates their desire.You see, here’s the real trap of modernity… the key thing that’s caused us pain (especially women)…
Most women aren’t looking for a man, they’re looking for a man to make her feel something.
Her desire is high so long as she can romanticize their dynamic.
The more a man is “strong, powerful, exciting, and deep”… the more a woman’s imagination can go into overdrive.Indeed: you could say the honeymoon period is less about a relationship’s novelty, and more about the presence of fantasy in a relationship.
Men do this too: unless trained to do otherwise, we ignore a woman’s bad traits and extrapolate off of her good ones. The honeymoon period only becomes less powerful over time because we learn that it’s full of shit, and that our fantasies aren’t real.
Anyway, the practical reasons I mention this are for discernment.
You see, if a woman is addicted to fantasy, you’re going to have an awesome time seducing her.
She’ll be dirty, kinky, obsessed with you…
But you’ll never have a good relationship with her.
Because eventually, that fantasy will die in the face of reality… and she’ll lose interest, looking for someone who is a “better fit” (read: allows her to create a new fantasy)
I know, I know… I bet I thought you’d give me a hack to get around this with women.
To keep the fantasy going forever.
But you can’t.
You can extend it, and this is a large part of game (stuff I can teach you very, very well… seduction is a specialty of mine)
But if you want a real relationship with a girl.
Don’t pick a girl who is trying to escape her own world.
Because while all girls fantasize… and all girls have an active imagination…
The most unhappy ones are the worst offenders.
Because they depend on their fantasies to get through life.
Happy girls enjoy reality. So they can also enjoy reality with you.
But I know this isn’t always easy to gauge with women. Or resist for that matter.
The girls who are best at fantasizing are the ones who are best at creating fantasies.
You need to learn to see through these techniques.
And most importantly:
Learn to see the vulnerabilities in yourself that make YOU so likely to fall for them.
Most girls say they want real, when they actually want fake.But most guys do the same.
(And they wonder why they can’t find a great girl)
Anyway, if you want the tools and mindset to attract and keep these real women.
You know where to go: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
