I briefly tweeted out a thread yesterday on this topic before deleting it.
(The topic wasn’t “red meat” for the twitter… and perhaps a bit too controversial… plus I think threads have become passé)
But I figured why not turn it into an email for you guys instead, even if it is a bonus.
This was inspired by a reader question awhile back, who asked me if women had the same capacity for growth as men.
It’s a delicate question.
I know I have some very smart, introspective female readers on here.
But I’m going to give my honest take.
I don’t believe women possess the same will or capacity for change as men.
And I think a lot of this comes down to genetics.
Men are nature’s experiments and sacrifices. A society can lose 80% of its male population and still rebound in a generation. If this happens to women, the society collapses.
This means women by nature are not meant to be risk takers – and you see this in their behavior. They’re the backbone of a society. Its future.
Its bonds vs start-up speculations.
This is why historically whenever a society has put women into a fighting situation, said society’s survival has been critical.
In contrast, men are easily discarded. Because they are guaranteed nothing, they are designed to risk more — if they do nothing, they get nothing — but if their risk pays off… they will obtain vast increases in their fitness and stature.
Among men there are two types of risk takers… the impulsive, animalistic types… and the visionary, strategic ones
Women are attracted to both men.
But the latter end up particularly in positions of power, and possess a very important trait:
Introspection.
Introspection is a a way of investigating oneself; questioning ones motives and intentions. It is the purview of high IQ types.
Both men and women introspect. But it is here that the gender differences break down yet again. Most women introspect their feelings and “analyze” themselves based on how they feel. They do not take a dispassionate, honest, and critical view of themselves.
I hate this conclusion, but my time interacting with men and women has led me to it, no matter how often I’ve attacked it.
Indeed — I suspect this is why “red pill” guys call women solipsistic. All roads in a certain sense do lead back to a rationalization of their actions.
You can see this even with intelligent women who can put all the pieces together of their misfortune… until they land on the conclusion that it was, in fact, their own fault. It is at this point they almost invariably they find a way to wriggle out of it.
People talk of the fragile male ego, but it is a half truth. Male egos are fragile in that they shatter — men admit their failures — and they either kill themselves over them, or build themselves anew.
But women are fragile in a different sense, in which the ego cannot be shattered — it simply finds new ways to rationalize.
Women who escape this trap generally only do so when they have a man they love who helps guide them out of it. Otherwise they will spend time chasing their emotions, explaining each passing mood as fact.
(The Southern California spirituality community is a prime example of this)
Anyway why this potentially harsh email on women?
Someone asked, and it’s what I’ve seen. You’re on this list because it’s honest insights, not whitewashed boilerplate.
But there’s one last thing to discuss here before I close out.
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that women do this.
Guys say that want a woman who is totally honest with herself all the time and in control over her emotions.
And then they say they want a feminine woman.
Guess what guys — femininity in it’s purest form is childlike innocence.
Femininity is amorphous and ephemeral.
Masculinity is directive and penetrating. By nature feminine women cannot fully nail down themselves because that would require them to abscond their femininity.
Only men can do this.
But guess what?
You can guide women to growth… because this is what masculine men do for feminine women.
They anchor them. They give them a point to grow upon.
This is why I increasingly believe the “Eat, Pray, Love” approach to self-growth for women has been mostly a disaster.
Women grow in relationships, because relationships (and especially children) anchor them.
A woman will grow to obtain and maintain the love of a great man.
And that’s not a bad thing.
That’s just women.
Love them for it.
(It’s these differences that make them so intoxicating)
Anyway, this is just a fragment of a conversation I might have with a client.
Conversations that help you to understand how men and women operate on a deep level.
And help you have the relationships with women very, very few men on the planet have.
If you *just* want to get laid, don’t work with me.
There are plenty of guys who will show you that (and who are much cheaper).
I’m here to realign your understanding of yourself and women so attracting and keeping beautiful women will never be an issue again for you.
No, it’s not an overnight process.
But it’s one that will save you years in the end.
(Quality is our motif over here…)
Apply here if you’re curious: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
