Last email we talked about lust, and the unattractiveness of it.
But the truth is… well… I wasn’t being entirely truthful.
Plenty of people successfully hook up when their only motivating factor is lust.
Indeed, being a sick, lust-filled pervert can mean quite a bit of sex.
But there’s a catch.
Something that might not be pleasant to hear, but needs to be said.
To play the game this way, you need to be physically attractive.
The reason is simple.
If you’re a lust-filled person, you need to attract other lust-filled people if you want to get off regularly.
You need to attract people who want to use you.
And to meet that demand, you have to be hot.
Hot people who are lustful get laid quite frequently with other hot people looking for transactional sex, and automatically with average looking people who also seek it out.
You can be a sick, perverted monster — but so long as you look good, you can get away with it, because you’ll also fulfill someone else’s fantasy.
So, lust can work.
For a time.
But eventually you’ll get old and ugly.
(And then you’ll have to pay for the pleasure.)
How to avoid this trap?
Don’t play the game.
Lust and love may seem compatible — you can lust so hard for someone the passion consumes you.
But do it long enough, and the objectification kills the dynamic.
Lust requires too much outcome independence.
And to stop this, you have to go deep.
Into your intentions. Into your needs.
You need to understand why you can’t desire a woman for who she is, instead of how she acts and what she represents.
And to do that you must understand both women and yourself.
Two things I can help you do, very very well.
Go here if interested: www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
