It’s become apparent over the years that my style is quite different from most of the typical dating coaches.

Despite the evolution of “the industry” away from negs, canned PUA routines, etc… people are still grounding themselves in the numbers game.

More focus on strategy (physique, lifestyle, masculinity) vs tactics (peacocking, status-faking, game), but still going after women in the same way: quantity.

Now, I’m not entirely against this approach.

Some guys need to practice their conversation skills. Others need to know if they talk to a woman and things don’t work out, the world won’t end.

And also, nothing bad about having options.

So I suppose I lied a bit in the header, since on occasion these stone cold steve austin approaches can have some macro value.

But, I don’t think they work too well for getting with women… or at least getting women that will actually make an impact in your life.

Practice with flirting? Sure.

Sex? Indeed… if you practice a lot.

But mostly for one night stands or *at best* multi-week long flings.

The reason is a bit strange.

Maybe some of you noticed I talked about predestination on the twitter TL yesterday.

That’s a topic for another time… but suffice it applies to more than just your purpose in life.

The truth is there are people we pass in life that have pathways associated with them.

Most of the time we ignore these pathways, and in many cases that’s OK. To take one path is often to compromise another.

But, it doesn’t change the fact that we are drawn to some people — and this is not a “coincidence.”

I met a close friend through Jury Duty. We’ve changed each others’ lives, though who would have thought that at the time… yet we both unconsciously felt the need to talk to each other.

My best friend I’ve known since the first day of kindergarten. For no reason whatsoever he jumped on MY back in line.

And of course… it applies to women too.

I met my wife at a wedding across the world I impulsively decided to attend… and when I approached her, I did it more confidently than I’ve ever done with a woman before… despite me knowing nobody there, her being gorgeous, and me not drinking at all.

Some might say that there is nothing to this.

“Durr we are just atoms interacting with each other, your connection with someone is just a statistical fluke”

Aka the kind of takes only someone with ZERO connection to themselves or their values can make.

I know better.

The truth is sometimes you may not “know” someone, but the approach isn’t cold.

There is an energy to them.

You see a woman across a crowd, and feel the impulse to talk to her. It doesn’t make any sense.

Sometimes, she’s not even the hottest woman there.

But when you follow the interaction and approach… 9/10 times the interaction isn’t just good, but amazing.

Don’t believe me?

I explained this to a client the other day, and later that week he passed on such a woman in the subway.

It haunted him.

I told him… don’t do that again.

So he didn’t.

A few days later he was drawn to a girl in the park and approached, even though this isn’t something he’s used to doing.

They’ve now had 3 dates, and she’s already saying things like “I feel like I’ve known you forever.”

(for what it’s worth, he feels the same)

Interesting stuff, no?

I teach tactics, and show guys how to interpret behavior and read interactions.

But the real gold in my work ain’t there.

It’s not even my no-bullshit way of addressing how you lie to yourself…

Or in showing you how to create powerful, connected social networks that bring fun, friendship, and females effortlessly into your life…

It’s in the self-alignment my coaching cultivates.

Helping you to tap into YOURSELF, and thus the energy flowing around you.

Helping you to make your life easy.

Like getting into a canoe on a river going downstream, rather than walking on its banks.

It’s not for everybody.

Definitely not for penny pinchers.

(I’m patient — and even hold prices — for guys who need time to get the money, but if you make a big deal out of the cost, you are not my client… go shop at the discount guru down the street)

Just those who are long-term oriented, and want to change their lives permanently.

(and not only with women… boy do these shifts run deep)

The link is here: www.patstedman.com/application

– Pat