Yesterday I mentioned a client had a kissing mishap with a girl.

But what was more interesting was what transpired earlier.

You see, my compadre found himself in a situation before with this girl, and didn’t know what whether she liked him or not.

Truth be told, it can be tough to see such things.

You don’t know what’s going through her head. Mixed signals abound.

But there’s one thing that cuts through the fat instantly.

Something that has, incidentally, become a bit of a trademark thing for me.

Subcommunication.

For example:

A girl may say or do tons of different things in your presence.

She may bring up an ex. She may sit close to you but then get uncomfortable and move away.

If you analyze too many of these things from a tactical framework (“what did she mean when she did this”) then you’ll get lost in the weeds.Most tactics, after all, are feints.

No — to understand what is really going on, you must assess the strategy.

What a girl really is aiming for deep down.

(even if she is not conscious of it yet).

So, to continue with the example, a girl may do all these random things, but the real question is simple: why is she at your place?

Some actions reveal intention more than others, but no action perhaps indicates more of what’s “going on under the hood” than a woman CHOOSING to be in a place with you.

This especially applies if she goes out of her way to find a way to hang out with you.

If this happens you have very little doubt that she likes you.

There may be other obstacles. Perhaps another guy is in the picture complicating things. The frame of the relationship may also not be ideal.

(she might be a little unstable or crazy)

But there’s no question she’s interested.

Men are bigger, and potentially scary. Women don’t put themselves in situations where men they don’t want get the wrong impression… since you never know the guy, and bad things can happen.

(exception: very self-destructive, low self-esteem women who unconsciously want bad stuff to happen… or the extremely naive)

Anyway, subcommunication lesson of the day.

Look at where a girl is spending her time before considering what she’s doing there.

Actions speak louder than words…

And if you want someone to detect these little tells, so you don’t miss big opportunities?

You know where to go: www.patstedman.com/application

– Pat

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