THE REAL REASON WOMEN LOVE RICH GUYS
There are many things in the dating world under dispute.
One of them is not.
Women love rich guys.
Like status, money is an aphrodisiac to women. Ugly, out of shape men “punch above their weight” (literally) with pretty women so long as they have money. And society’s feminine beauties – the top shelf of attractive women – almost exclusively date men in the top 10% (especially 1-5%) of income.
Of course, if you’ve read any of this blog, you’d know that I don’t believe that men are stuck romantically if they don’t have cash. I am the last person on earth who suggests anything in dating or life is deterministic. You truly don’t need a ton of money to get beautiful, feminine girls with solid ethics. Men who tell you otherwise have a scarcity mentality.
But, I’d still be a pretty shit dating coach if I didn’t acknowledge the fundamentals. Women love rich guys. If they didn’t, we wouldn’t have the golddigger stereotypes, and we wouldn’t have models and actresses congregating around the wealthy.
The question isn’t whether it’s true, but why.
Women love rich guys, but what is it about wealth that attracts women?
Why Do Women Love Rich Guys? Comfort and Lifestyle.
Money has multiple roles in attraction, but creating comfort is no question the biggest.
Which makes sense.
After all… the more money you have, the less restrictions on living the life you want there will be.
With big money you can travel at will, live in the best real estate, enjoy the finest cuisine, indulge in the coolest playthings, obtain the best health care, and gain access to the best parties.
You can have maids and aids and any sort of personal trainers you dream of.
With a lot of money, the sky’s the limit.
It’s the ultimate comfort creator.
So, it should be of no shock to men that women love rich guys. Women love money. Men love it too!
But while it’s safe to say all women like money, how much money they really demand varies per individual. Culture, personality, and upbringing all play a role.
Yet there are some universal, hard and fast rules to guide your way.
The Rules of Riches and Women
Rule #1: No Downgrades. I’m fairly certain I’ve heard Chris Rock talk about this a time or three, but women hate lifestyle downgrades. Of course, all people hate to lose what they have, but women are notorious about demanding at least a consistent standard of living. If they get used to a certain way of life, they are loathe to give it up.
The implications of this are two-fold. Firstly, be careful what you get a woman used to, as she will expect it in the future. And secondly, be aware that the higher-class woman you meet, the more you will have to provide for her. This means for some girls, if you want to play the game long-term with them, you need money on their level.
For these girls, money isn’t so much of an “attraction” booster, rather, it’s what you need to even gain access.
Rule #2: Have Enough For Yourself. The second rule is more practical and understandable. While most women like their man to bring in a little bit extra to make them both more comfortable, all women expect their man to at least be able to provide for himself.
Most men are OK with taking care of a woman financially – some even prefer it. But flip the script, and it drives a woman crazy. Taking care of a man financially stresses a woman out, and though she may still love the man if he’s “showing up” in other ways, the evidence is clear it takes the passion out of a relationship.
There’s a reason so many marriages fall apart when men lose their jobs. It’s not just financial stress, it’s the psychological stress that the woman now has to carry water for both of them. Even if they’re still living well on her salary alone, a woman providing for a man’s survival is just unattractive to her.
Rule #3: Be Age Appropriate. A perceptive man might realize by now though that something is wrong about this “need” for wealth we’ve been talking about. After all, plenty of young guys live in squalor and have different girls rotating in and out of their apartment, sometimes multiple times a day. They have no issue getting a girlfriend or hooking up despite being broke. What’s going on here?
It all comes down to age.
When you’re a young guy, the truth is, money doesn’t matter very much. Women love rich guys, but not only are most girls not looking to settle down at a young age (so financial comfort isn’t as big of a deal), but socially no one expects you to have your shit figured out. Up through your mid-20s being a bum isn’t a big deal for girls. It’s only once you start to get to your late-20s and especially your 30s that a lack of money starts to become a problem.
When you’re older, there’s an expectation that you should have money situation figured out.
This is true even if the girl is much younger than you and doesn’t care that much about “financial comfort.” Because you’re older, she expects you to have money. If you don’t, it begins to undermine not only her comfort from you but her desire. She begins to question what’s wrong with you. If you don’t have a good reason and good plan to change things (and even then), you’re in big trouble.
So understand, the importance of money has everything to do with not only the girl’s age, but your own.
How Money Impacts Desire
Up until now, we’ve been mostly focusing on how money impacts the “comfort” side of attraction.
But it affects the desire side too… or at least, it can.
You got a taste of it in the last point. If you’re older, you’re expected to have money… and if you don’t, you lose desire.
But why is that the case? In part, because by your 30s you’re obviously not a little kid anymore and you’re supposed to be self-sustaining.
But also, because older men are expected to be powerful.
(or at least, more powerful than younger men)
And money is a strong signal that you have power and influence.
The truth is, in the long term it is very difficult to have power and influence and not accumulate money in the process. The only times this doesn’t happen is when the person with power and influence chooses to eschew money… usually out of “principle.”
(but really, in order to increase his power and influence further. That way they can say they are not “bought out” and are pursuing whatever goal they’re pursuing for the “right reasons”)
But these cases are the exception, and are moreover optional. If you have power and influence, you can profit off of it. Power and influence means you can get people to do things, and that is worth a lot of money. Look no further than athletes prostituting themselves on advertisements to see this in action.
So if you’ve got money, many women will be intrigued whether it also comes with power.
If it does, you’ve trip-wired her to feel not only comfort with you but desire.
The Money-Power Relationship
If you have power, you can get money – that’s no problem. But while money can also create power, the relationship between them is not as strong – at least in the attraction sense. Money is more about access and influence, and although these are powers in their own right, they are far less attractive to women on a sexual level.
The truth is, women are attracted to power derived from leadership. They don’t get nearly the same tingly feelings from men who “pull the strings” as they do from men who put themselves in the firing line. This is why women are attracted to ambitious men: they show signs of wanting to be in the arena and fight.
This dynamic is clearly expressed in the different relationships women have with old money and new money guys. Old money guys might have beautiful girls, but not only is it less likely, the relationship between the guys and their women are more… shall we say… placid. Meanwhile, new money guys (and old money guys with a new money attitude) tend to be playboys, hanging around with all sorts of models and living an adrenaline-fueled life.
This is because old money guys tend to have cushy jobs and prioritize caution in their investments. They provide mostly just comfort to women. In contrast, new money guys are by requirement risk-takers and create both comfort through their cash and desire through their attitude.
Generally, the more risks you took to acquire your money and/or the more impact your venture made, the more desire you will create. Which is why guys who make big bucks in “stable,” corporate professions like Big Law or investment banking (even if they’re not old money) can expect to create minimal desire no matter how much cash they make.
So at the end of the day, while money itself only creates comfort, the way the money is acquired might also create desire. That’s why women love rich guys, but not all rich guys the same way.
This article branched off a lot into situations that might not be directly applicable to you. The reason for that was to show the psychology behind why women love rich guys, and for you to plan accordingly.
There are no disadvantages in dating to having more money, except perhaps that you are more likely to have women come into your life who are manipulative and want you only for that (comfort). Money overall opens doors to interesting and impactful ventures, which creates desire, and money gives you access to social circles that contain the most beautiful and feminine women out there. And should you nab some girls there, it helps you to keep them.
In other words, money is opportunity and freedom.
But remember: at the end of the day, money is a passive indicator of value in your life, not an active one. You can have all the money in the world and still be a chump if you don’t have game and the right mindset. Don’t think because women love rich guys they’re going to love you. It takes far more than that.
See me for coaching if you want to get that handled.
PS This is just a small corner of the world of attraction. Get my Special Report on What Women Really Want From Men to experience the big picture. It’ll help the context of this article to make more sense. Oh, and it’s free.